Stirring up magic at the Devil’s Cauldron
Top of the Falls, Murchison Falls National Park
There is an inevitability about the constant flow of the River Nile that I find quite overwhelming.
I find myself imagining the distance this water has travelled. Day and night, night and day, for tens of thousands of years, billions of gallons of water have raced through Murchison Falls en route to the Mediterranean. Kingdoms have risen and fallen, we live, we die, but still the water keeps coming. Imagine if the Nile had a memory: what stories would it tell us!
There are several vantage points at the top of Murchison Falls, arguably the biggest draw to the National Park. To the right of the drop-off point, there is a glimpse upstream of where the River Nile is half a kilometre wide. See the staggering speed of the water, racing towards a gap in the rocks that is just seven metres wide. The water flows ferociously fast. It is breath-taking.
I stand at the edge of this incredible feat of nature, trying – but failing – to comprehend its total and utter awesomeness. Oh, how microscopic and unimportant I feel with my little camera!
Thousands of people have taken photographs of the Top of the Falls so I can’t pretend I can improve on others’ incredible shots. The truth is, you cannot possibly capture the essence of Murchison Falls with a camera. You need to visit.
You need to see it with your own eyes.
You need to smell the river, feel its thundering power beneath your feet, listen to its roar, let the spray touch your body…
The water mesmerises me. Its power is so compelling. I feel its draw as I stand by the railings above the Devil’s Cauldron, the point where the River Nile plummets, crashes and explodes down a 43 metre drop.
It’s both exciting and scary.
How small I am. Stand in the wrong place and certain death is instant. I would be swept away in a second; indeed, more than one person has chosen to end their life at Murchison Falls. The river’s huge Nile crocodiles (some measuring an astonishing four or five metres long) are unlikely to mean a body is recovered either. There is a strong link between waterfalls and death in Uganda: certain waterfalls in the south west are historically associated with some macabre practices, like the forced ‘damping’ (dumping or drowning) of young women who were perceived to have broken the strict moral codes of the day.
I record a short video clip. As much as I am recording, I’m watching too, trying to make sense of what I am seeing, struggling to understand it. Although every scene is like every other: ‘water cascades over rock’ / ‘water shoots up into the air’ ad infinitum, it has a life of its own. Amongst the voluminous cascades and torrents are microscopic droplets that dance ghost-like in the air for a second before being consumed into a cloud of mist.
The water wears many costumes. At once dramatic and imposing, in a split second it is intriguing and dainty. I see magic everywhere.
I suddenly feel a gust of wind. I am safely behind the railing but I feel the wind catch me. Is it blowing me away from the water or pulling me towards it? Is my imagination playing tricks on me? I take a few steps backwards. I’m so lost in watching the movement of the water from the safety of my camera screen that I’m wary of the water tricking me. (See what personality I have given it)? It may only be water but I feel it has a life of its own. It makes me nervous.
The moment is a reminder to put the camera down. You can’t beat the full-frontal vision of Murchison Falls and I cherish the sensation of the river’s spray dancing over my face and bare legs.
The Devil’s Cauldron! Diary of a Muzungu goes to the Top of Murchison Falls with Wild Frontiers from @CharlieBeau Diary of a Muzungu on Vimeo.
“The water level has dropped,” Evelyn tells me. “Before, you would get completely soaked standing here” she says, as we pose for photographs next to the safety rails on the small outcrop of rock above the Devil’s Cauldron. (I wrote this story in 2017 – what devastation the high waters have wrought since!)
Sadly, we don’t have time today to walk down to the Bottom of Murchison Falls. It’s a steep walk, on a decent path with handrails and, if you plan it well, you can catch a boat from the bottom. It is only by taking this path that you have the imposing sight of both Murchison Falls (once known as Kabalega Falls) and the lesser-known Uhuru Falls.
Tip: take the time to do this excellent walk, for if you do, you will have one photo of Murchison Falls that your friends don’t!
A bit of history
Originally the falls were known as Kabalega Falls. Indeed, some Ugandans continue to refer to the indigenous name. However, explorer Sir Samuel Baker renamed Murchison Falls after Sir Roderick Murchison, president of the Royal Geographical Society. (He also renamed Lake Mwitanzige to Lake Albert, in honour of Queen Victoria’s ‘consort’ Albert). The Sir Samuel and Lady Florence Baker Historical Trail runs 805 km (500 km) through the African bush, and recalls the 1864 route they took from South Sudan into Murchison Falls National Park. The Trail features on National Geographic’s World’s Best Hikes: 20 Dream Trails.
The muzungu’s Murchison Falls travel tips
I travelled to Murchison Falls with Wild Frontiers Uganda and stayed at the superb Baker’s Lodge, on the southern bank of the river, in a luxury thatched safari suite looking straight onto the Nile. We ate every scrumptious meal outside and I even had a dip in the swimming pool. (No extra charge for the soothing sound of hippos munching outside your cottage as you fall asleep!) DISCLAIMER: sadly the Nile has completely consumed this gorgeous lodge!
Watch out for the crocodiles & hippos! (Very amateur film) of the boat ride to the Bottom of Murchison Falls from @CharlieBeau Diary of a Muzungu on Vimeo.
The scum on the surface of the river water is created by the turbulent Falls and is composed of organic matter (rotting fish and hippo, to be exact!)
The walk from the Top to the Bottom of the Falls (and back up) costs and takes one to 1 to 1 ½ hours. It costs $10 / $10 / 10,000 UGX (tourists / foreign residents / EAC citizens) according to the Uganda Wildlife Authority’ tariff for 2022.
Wild Frontiers and Uganda Wildlife Authority both run boat trips up and down the River Nile. I took the Wild Frontiers boat cruise to the Bottom of the Falls “possibly the world’s most powerful waterfall in terms of the force of water ejected from the Falls itself.”
Another superb experience in Murchison Falls is the Delta cruise with Wild Frontiers’ excellent guides Milton and Dan. On our trip, they located not one but three rare Shoebills!
[Click here to learn about the horrendous plan to dam Murchison Falls!]
Wild Frontiers are the only company to offer a private Bush Breakfast on the northern bank of the Nile. The best way to experience this is by first taking the early morning Delta cruise. After breakfast, you can circle back to your lodge via a game drive through the park. The Muzungu has enjoyed 😊
Have you been on safari in Murchison Falls National Park?
Sundowners, star-gazing & tales from the bush
A weekend at Nile Safari Lodge and lunch at Masindi Hotel
There’s a cool breeze coming off the Nile tonight.
My banda at Nile Safari Lodge is open-netted on three sides. Set on stilts above the riverbank, it is airy and spacious. My banda has a wide veranda overlooking the river.
The two-tone noise beyond the nets can only be a frog. It is so loud that in my mind’s eye I imagine the frog to be a foot long! We hear the occasional HONK of a hippo.
The background noise is a symphony of crickets. According to Zahid, “all you have to do is clap your hands and the noise of the crickets will stop, for 15 seconds at least, and then they will resume. Don’t worry, they automatically shut down by around 10.30pm !” The muzungu isn’t concerned. I look forward to the crickets lulling me to sleep before too long.
A lunch stop at Masindi Hotel
At Masindi Hotel, we received a friendly, understated welcome before eating a simple salad. (The heat in the middle of the day was too hot to consider eating anything else). The service was polite and swift.
Masindi Hotel is one of the original government-owned Uganda Hotels, and was managed well until Amin’s day. It and many others were sold off in the 1990s. Standards slipped. According to the hotel information, Masindi is the oldest Uganda Hotel, built in 1923. It is Indian owned now and has touches of classic Indian decor to complement the original building design and classic gardens. The hardwood interiors of the main living areas are beautifully done. The main building has welcoming bright yellow paintwork.
Famous guests have included Ernest Hemingway, Kathryn Hepburn and Humphrey Bogart. The Kabalega Restaurant is named “in honour of the legacy of his Majesty Chwa II.” What history! What associations! What a shame this place is not better utilised. [Masindi Hotel has undergone a substantial facelift since I wrote this story].
Driving from Masindi to Murchison Falls National Park
The approach to Murchison Falls National Park is dusty. As we drive the dirt roads approaching the main gate, we close the windows and put the AC on. This is tsetse fly territory. I’d forgotten about those nuisance insects. (Guess who’s wearing a bright blue dress to enter the park? Tsetse flies are strongly attracted to the exact shade of blue that I’m wearing).
Zahid has been visiting Murchison Falls all his life. He points to the bridge that his engineer father constructed. “There used to be so many elephants and buffalo on this side of the river that we had to stop. We could not pass.” These days, most big mammals are confined to the north bank of the Nile.
There are no other vehicles on the road. Our only road companions are baboons, Buffalo, a Marabou Stork, a pair of Helmeted Guineafowl and one of my favourite birds, the Abyssinian Ground Hornbill, its curled eyelashes long enough to make any girl jealous. Flashes of bright blue are the tell-tale sign of Woodland Kingfishers. Swirling flashes of green are Cinnamon-chested Beeeaters.
We enter the park on World Wildlife Day.
Arrival at Nile Safari Lodge
We arrive at Nile Safari Lodge late afternoon.
It’s March and it’s hot. Rain has hit Kampala but barely reached this part of Uganda yet. There have been bush fires. A few drops of rain have brought green leaves to the tips of burnt bush.
After a friendly welcome at the lodge, I watch ten monkeys picking fresh shoots from the tree next to reception. The monkeys are obviously happy here; there are many young among their group. They’re not scared by us, nor do they beg. Humans and monkeys coexist happily at Nile Safari Lodge.
As we enjoy our sundowners on the deck below the dining area, we spot the flapping ears of an elephant on the distant bank of the River Nile. He gently tugs at the long grass as he saunters upstream. Three Grey Herons fly by. An African open-billed stork and a cormorant fish below us. To our right is a small island that is popular with a pod of hippo and a dozen elephants who swim from the shore. We spot waterbuck too.
Nile Safari Lodge was the first lodge to be built on the south bank of the Nile in Murchison Falls National Park and still has the best view of the river. I remember when I first visited in 2010: we arrived mid-afternoon to see 20 elephants at the river’s edge on the opposite bank of the river.
What a lovely spot in which to wile away a few quiet days. It’s low season and there are only two other guests, a Ugandan lady and her Hungarian husband. We share a dinner table as we enjoy thick creamy home-made soup and the tastiest Nile Perch. The beers are cold and there’s plenty of ice. With freshly squeezed juice for breakfast (no added sugar), fruits and a cooked breakfast of eggs, sausage, tomato and toast, I really should have done a bit more exercise! Lunch and dinner are both three course affairs.
Early morning on the River Nile
Something on the roof awakens me the next morning. It takes a few moments to realise that there are monkeys overhead! They are so sure-footed, I swear they are human.
I go back to sleep and wake to sounds coming from the river: a flock of Pied Kingfishers and the occasional early morning launch boat, heading out for the start of today’s fishing competition. My morning tea arrives promptly. Hot water is brought for my morning ablutions. I love this banda. If I leave all the doors open, I can watch the River Nile from my open-air shower.
Our breakfast conversations are about crocodiles and hippos – near escapes in fact! Zahid’s friend “Crocodile Dog” had a lucky escape. He lived to tell the tale of his attack by a croc – albeit “minus one leg.”
“Those things come out of nowhere!” Zahid says, as he tells us another tale of lucky escape. Luckily for us, Nile Safari Lodge is high enough above the river to ensure visits by crocodiles and hippos are impossible.
Pakuba Lodge frequently comes up in conversation. There are rumours that this historical lodge will be refurbished one day. For now, nature has reclaimed Amin’s old lodge. “I saw two porcupines cornering a hyena there once,” Wolfgang tells us. I’ve also heard rumours of a resident leopard. Look what the BBC cauught on camera at Amin’s Pakuba Lodge!
(The Pakuba Lodge where I stayed to view Uganda’s extraordinary solar eclipse is in fact the revamped former staff housing of the original Pakuba).
Murchison Falls National Park has seen many changes. Murchison was Amin’s favourite National Park. It later became Joseph Kony‘s favourite park, making it a no-go area for many years. This was back in the 1990s and the park’s wildlife is thriving again, although oil drilling is the next challenge.
In search of Bugungu Fort
One morning, our driver Adong takes us to the site of Bugungu Fort, one of Samuel Baker’s forts. (It’s rumoured that an oil pipe may soon be laid right next to it).
Here, the River Nile is inside the National Park so fishing is prohibited. Of course, some people still try, especially since it’s impossible to police every inch of the river. Traditional crops include cotton, sweet potatoes and cassava but it’s been dry for months now. There is evidence of fires all around us.
After a morning talking about crocodiles and fires, my guide walks us down to the river past a small fire on which men are roasting cassava.
“Are there any crocodiles here?” I ask. “Oh yes!” Comes the opposite answer to the one I wanted. We walk through the fragment of Bugungu Forest. A few minutes into the forest and someone mentions tsetse flies. (Guess who’s wearing blue again?)
Where once was a wooden construction, all that remains of Bugungu Fort is a big hole in the ground like a small bomb crater. There are several large Mwai trees, complex trees whose convoluted branches have many smaller branches growing in every direction. They’re an important part of local culture.
We walk for another 10 minutes down to Delta Point, at the river’s edge. To the left is the Delta. To the right, upriver, are the famous Murchison Falls themselves. Here the riverbed is sandy. Further on, I spy a long straight pole poking from the surface of the river. It’s the unmistakable shape of a fishing pole. We look down to see a man’s pair of sandals next to it. The river comes under the jurisdiction of the Uganda Wildlife Authority. It is illegal to fish here.
We pause next to a Kigelia ‘sausage tree.’ I’ve always been fascinated by these weird-looking plants. Inedible in their raw form to humans, elephants love these huge fruits. You may know these fruits as the Amarula Tree. I quiz the local man about their uses for humans. Apparently peel one, boil the inside and you have a cure for Syphilis!
For some reason, I’d assumed the fruit was hollow and light, like a gourd. It takes the muzungu two hands to lift one!
Adong picks up a wire. “This must be a snare,” he says. Although there is little wildlife on this bank of the river, according to Rogers from Nile Safari Lodge, “some small antelope do swim across the river” into a snare if they are unlucky. Here, downstream from Nile River Lodge, we are just outside the Protected Area of Murchison Falls National Park.
A few metres on, a young man stands next to the lakeshore. An older, barefooted man stands next to him. They look at us, we look back at them. He must have heard us approaching before distancing himself from his fishing rod.
It’s interesting to be back in the bush, seeing first-hand the ongoing battle against poachers. I spent my first three years in Uganda as a volunteer with the Uganda Conservation Foundation fundraising to support the Uganda Wildlife Authority’s anti-poaching work in Queen Elizabeth. UCF are very active in Murchison Falls these days too.
Swimming at Nile Safari Lodge
After an intensely hot morning, it’s a relief to take a refreshing dip in the lodge’s pool. It is set away from the lodge and has a clear view of the River Nile. Massages can be organised at the tiny wooden structure below the swimming pool and above the riverbank. The masseuse has a great touch. I feel thoroughly spoiled.
One night we enjoy a vibrant performance by twenty Acholi dancers from the local village. The men wear elaborate feather headdresses which bounce up and down to the rhythm of the calabashes. The traditional drumming, the energetic hip-swaying of the dancers and the open fireplace make for a great atmosphere.
If you are into stargazing, you must bring your telescope.
Zahid showed us great views of Venus ‘evening star’ and a close-up of the moon’s cratered surface. Wow! I’ll never see the moon in the same way again. To the naked eye, Venus and the Moon appear a similar size but Zahid tells us Venus is a staggering 60 million miles away while the Moon is a mere 250,000 miles away.
Shoebill Camp – for the best view of the River Nile
Shoebill Camp is a spacious setting overlooking the Nile, adjacent to Nile Safari Lodge. I camped here with my sister on my first visit. This can be a great arrangement for people who are on a budget, or who like camping but not cooking! For just $10 a night, you have a whole field to yourself, a cold shower and flushing toilets. The security guard can light a fire for you too. It’s just five minutes’ walk through the bush to the lodge where you can enjoy all your meals and cold drinks, and the swimming pool (for an additional fee).
I’ll always remember how after dinner at the lodge, my sister and I were escorted through the bush by an elderly man with a bow and arrow. Our path through the vegetation was lit by glow-worms. It was magic.
Nile Safari Lodge is about to embark on a comprehensive refurbishment programme. With just a few touches here and there, I’m sure that Nile River Lodge will once again be the go-to place that it was for many years.
A big thank you to Zahid, John, Rogers and Dennis (who remembered me after a seven year absence!) It’s been particularly lovely to be back in a lodge where I have such happy memories of a family safari too.
Chinese tourism in Uganda – opportunity or threat?
China and Uganda: tourism opportunities and conservation threats
Welcome to Diary of a Muzungu! This week’s guest post is by Sandra Rwese, a brilliant Ugandan entrepreneur who I first heard speak at a Nature Uganda public talk in Kampala. Sandra gave us an introduction to Chinese culture, the opportunities – and threats – that this new market poses to tourism and conservation in Uganda. Her insights are fascinating!
Sandra Rwese is a bilingual tourism expert with many years research experience in China’s outbound tourism landscape. In 2012 she won the Silver Prize for Product Innovation during the prestigious CTW Awards in Beijing. She writes:
“Travel is my religion, and Asia is one of the most fascinating places l happened to explore during my many travels. Having spent time living and studying in mainland China and Hong Kong, l decided to relocate back to Kampala in 2014. I saw a niche in Sino-Africa travel connections and immediately went about launching my tourism consulting firm Gulu & Hirst (G&H).
It took infinite persistence trying to market my advisory services in Uganda – in a country where CEOs prefer to wait until the absolute last minute before reacting to fresh business ideas. I remember once waiting three hours in a reception hall for a brief chance to meet one leading tourism stakeholder. Such is the journey towards promoting China’s USD 422 billion consumer potential to Uganda’s tourism fraternity.
Part of my consulting includes pushing for ecological conservation and, with each public lecture or sales training session, l never miss an opportunity to caution my audiences on the environmental ramifications of mass travel from China. Yes the Chinese have big money to spend overseas, lots of it. But their high propensity for eating arthropods and game meat could come at a higher cost to Uganda’s plant and animal species than we imagined. We simply cannot afford mass Chinese arrivals in groups as large as 200 per flight.
Chinese tourists are fearless and have gained ill-repute in almost every country so far. Nothing is off limits. Not even rampant trafficking of cheetah hides, donkey meat, lion bones, ivory, sandalwood, albino crocodiles, butterflies, pangolins, sea turtles, and rare national treasures. In my analysis, Uganda’s only hope in upholding species protection rights is by forming legally binding partnerships with travel agents and institutions sending visitors from China. So that their groups are fewer and contained.
New Zealand is doing just that i.e. partnering with travel agents, universities, and FITs (Free Independent Travelers) in China to bring controlled tour groups. This closes the loop on traffickers who often sneak in on individual tourist visas. I see a win-win situation for Uganda if only this matter is taken as a matter of urgency; especially with new waves of Chinese migrants setting up tour companies right here and ferrying in travellers whose origins are anyone’s guess.
The second strategy would be to use Chinese social media campaigns to promote responsible tourism. Community outreach is critical and netizens must be alerted to Uganda’ laws against poaching and wildlife plunder. G&H is moving in this very direction towards RenRen, Sina Weibo, WeChat, Qzone and other popular social apps to convey Uganda’s conservation mantra to the 136 million Chinese planning annual trips abroad. We can successfully build #BrandUganda on such social platforms within China by spreading the message that “Uganda is not for sale.”
Thank you Sandra for some illuminating words and practical advice about the Chinese in Uganda and Africa.
Listen to Sandra being interviewed by Eric Olander on The China Africa Project debating the question: Chinese tourist arrivals in Africa are up, so why aren’t African travel companies more excited? Click on the green button below.
Where to travel in East Africa: the muzungu’s recommendations
Diary of a Muzungu’s recommendations for Uganda, Kenya, Rwanda
Happy New Year, dear Diary reader! Thanks for your support.
Are you thinking about where the next 12 months will take you? Here are some of my favourite places …
UGANDA – Kampala “KLA”- coffee, culture and chimpanzees!
Denmark’s most popular newspaper, Politiken, asked me to recommend the Top Things To Do in Kampala for their Insider Guide. We agreed that Danish culture and cafe buffs would appreciate the Ndere Cultural Centre, Gaddafi National Mosque in Old Kampala, Kampala Art Biennale, the Bahai Temple and Acacia Mall in Kisementi (for the obligatory cappuccino fix).
There are many Kampala tours; uniquely, the Kampala Dark Day Tour is the creation of a criminologist! Namugongo Martyrs Shrine and Wamala Tombs are two of the tour’s most fascinating historical stops (blogs in draft folder!)
Ngamba Island Chimpanzee Sanctuary, Lake Victoria
Our closest relative is bound to inspire you! Ngamba Island Chimpanzee Sanctuary is perfect for a family day out, for camping with friends or as a romantic overnight getaway. It is internationally reknown for its high standards of primate care.
The whole family LOVED Ngamba Island Chimpanzee Sanctuary!
Mount Gahinga Lodge, Mgahinga Gorilla National Park, near Kisoro
Be the first of your friends to track the gorillas of Mgahinga! The little-visited but engaging gorilla family has now been resident for three years, so sightings are virtually guaranteed. Alternatively, track the rare golden monkeys, hike one of the Virunga’s three volcanoes or interact with the Batwa tribe who inhabited the forests for 60,000 years. Their story is unique. For all the info you need to plan your trip to one my favourite parts of Uganda, read Can you name the distant volcanoes of Mgahinga?. Fly with Aerolink from Entebbe to Kisoro for a real treat!
Promoting tourism across Uganda: Arua and West Nile
Enthusiasm for tourism in Uganda is at an all time high across the country. I loved visiting Gerald Iga’s hometown of Arua. Read what I discovered in “10 little-known things to do in Arua & West Nile.”
Birdwatching – anywhere and everywhere in Uganda!
Sunbird Hill, next to Kibale Forest, is named for its 14 sunbird species (I’m sure the birding experts will find more!)
Ornithologist Malcolm Wilson is planning his next bird ringing expeditions when he will be ringing at Sunbird Hill and other popular Ugandan birding locations. Read Malcolm’s blog of a previous bird ringing trip to Sunbird Hill.
KENYA – Nairobi nightlife, rail journeys & the coast
Come, we go! The East Africa Tourist Visa & Interstate Pass make travel between Uganda, Kenya and Rwanda cheaper for tourists and expats + easier for nationals. Read my blog and go!
Did you know…? In 2017 the ‘Lunatic Express’ train from Nairobi to Mombasa was replaced by new trains on a new track. This gives you two opportunities: to ride the old-fashioned trains for the last time and, after Easter, enjoy the far quicker four-hour journey to the coast.
Tawi Lodge was named Ecotourism Kenya’s Eco-Warrior Facility of the Year. The award-winning conservancy has arguably the best views of (Tanzania’s) Mount Kilimanjaro.
Have you visited the muzungu’s Kenya travel page?
RWANDA: Nyungwe Forest, Rwanda
Kampala to Nyungwe by road: 14 hours by bus + 3 hours by matatu minibus + hmmm… a bit longer on a smaller bus + half an hour ride on a boda boda through the dark forest + hitch hiking is not everyone’s dream journey but Jules and I LOVED it! Nyungwe Forest’s canopy walk and chimp tracking are both highly recommended.
Have you visited the muzungu’s Rwanda travel page ?
Nyungwe Forest is in a remote corner of East Africa that borders Burundi and the DRC.
And just for laughs, here are a few highlights that you may have missed:
… laughing & (crying?) at another of the muzungu’s dating disasters
… more dramas at the airport!
… stalking celebrities! I love #SityaLoss – still my favourite dance video!
DID YOU KNOW…? Daily updates, Uganda travel advice and random photos come thick and fast on my Diary of a Muzungu Facebook page or follow me @CharlieBeau on Twitter.
It’s going to be a busy year for Diary of a Muzungu – where will you be traveling to? Do keep in touch!
Kyaninga Lodge – the dancing, running (and relaxing!) lodge
Kyaninga Lodge‘s breathtaking views
Since the recent launch of the Disney film ‘Queen of Katwe,’ Ugandans have been discussing how we can attract the film industry to film in Uganda. I first visited Kyaninga Lodge in 2011. Since then I’ve been unable to picture the lodge without imagining James Bond parachuting down into the crater lake below the lodge and jet-skiing across it! Kyaninga Lodge is unique. Read my review and you’ll quickly see why!
Kyaninga Lodge, near Fort Portal – early morning view of the crater lake from my cottage from @CharlieBeau Diary of a Muzungu on Vimeo.
What is so special about Kyaninga Lodge?
Stunning view? CHECK!
Helipad? CHECK!
Well-stocked bar serving the muzungu’s favourite tipple? CHECK!
Swimming pool with ridiculously gorgeous view? CHECK!
Superb food? CHECK!
Fab company? CHECK!
Driving to Kyaninga Lodge from Kampala
Despite a warning that we might find the dirt road from outside Fort Portal to the Lodge to be tricky driving in the rainy season, we had no problem. We didn’t even need to engage the four-wheel drive. The 20 minute drive on dirt roads show scenes of rural Ugandan life at its most picturesque.
Richard gave us a lovely welcome upon arrival. The keys to each cottage come in a tiny cloth bag, complete with your own personal mobile phone for the duration of your stay. The main lodge living area, lodge manager and all the rooms have their own phone number which are already keyed into the phone. What a great idea.
About Kyaninga Lodge – geography
The view from the lodge shifts and changes constantly thanks to the combination of the Rwenzori Mountains (seen in the distance) and the deep water of the lake. At times the mountains are clearly visible, sometimes they are obscured by cloud; in the early morning, mist lies in the valleys. It’s breathtakingly beautiful.
Over time, two volcanic craters have come together to form one of the deepest crater lakes in Uganda. The lake plunges a formidable 224 metres into the earth. Although water of this depth should be very cold, thanks to the semi-active properties of these craters the water is a comfortable temperature for swimming.
According to the lodge’s owner and designer Steve, “the lake is warming up. They have been measuring the temperature for the last 25 years and it is due to erupt again in 10,000 years!”
The lake water has a very high mineral content which stops the formation of any algae. This, and the fact that the lake has no shallows because of its deep sides, keeps the lake Bilharzia-free. Kyaninga is therefore one of the very few Ugandan lakes that is safe to swim in. A path leads from the lodge to steps that take you down to a floating jetty at the water’s edge.
Kyaninga Lodge – cottages
Each self-contained cottage is a little walk from all the others, meaning you have total privacy. Each cottage overlooks the crater lake and has a spectacular view of the Rwenzori’s. Every cottage has a wide self-contained veranda; no-one else can see you. Using your nifty little mobile phone, it’s possible to call for drinks to be served on your deck.
Thanks to its wooden construction, in and out, the lodge has a strong Alpine feel to it, although Steve told us he had never been inside a log cabin before he designed and built Kyaninga!
It’s wonderful to see how the lodge’s trees and beautifully landscaped gardens have matured. There is constant birdsong all day, always a healthy sign for the environment. In the valley to one side of the lodge is rumoured to be Uganda’s only lawn tennis court, which also doubles as a badminton court. Lodge guests can also play croquet and boules.
The Wi-Fi works well in the main lodge building and the rooms have three power points, so you’re well equipped for power. Helpfully, each room has an umbrella that you can use when moving between your room and the main building
Kyaninga Lodge is a labour of love and took six years to build. The timber (Eucalyptus and Elgon Olive) are found locally, as is the Semliki variety of grass, used for thatching.
Interesting fact: “Kyaninga Lodge is equipped with six fire hoses each capable of sending a jet of water over the top of the cabin or the main lodge building. The fire hoses are connected to a pump that is in turn connected to the swimming pool, meaning we have approximately 120,000 litres of water available – which should be plenty!”
The swimming pool itself is carved out of the rock face.
The main lodge building sits at the summit of one of the area’s famous rolling hills. The individual cottages hug the brow of the hill and slope down to either side of the main building in an equilateral pattern. The high ceilings and bare wood give a feeling of space. I imagine it might get chilly here but every evening, around sunset, the open fireplace is lit as guests congregate for pre-dinner drinks.
In addition to the main dining area, guests can choose to dine privately in one of the upstairs galleries.
What can you do at Kyaninga Lodge?
There’s a long list of complimentary activities:
- – Swimming in the lodge pool.
- – Lawn tennis, badminton, croquet and boules (lodge guests can borrow tennis balls and rackets from the Lodge).
- – Crater rim walk
- – Two private terraces below the swimming pool are perfect for a sundowner. One of the terraces even has a small fireplace.
- – Birdwatching
- – Swimming in the crater lake
- – Village and cultural walk
- – Forest walk inside the crater for a good chance of seeing monkeys and forest birds and the chance to peer inside a bat cave!
Kyaninga Lodge, crater rim walk
On our first morning, we set off on a circumnavigation of the crater lake ‘the crater rim walk’ below the lodge. We took our time, stopping every few minutes for photographs, admiring Kyaninga from different angles as we passed through fields of crops. The farmers told us of the crops they were planting: Irish potatoes, beans, cassava and yam. We saw fabulous birds including Cinnamon-chested Beeeaters, a male black and white Pin-tailed Wydah bird (complete with its long breeding plumage), an African Open-billed stork and a striking black and red Ross’s Turaco. The walk took us around two hours.
A spot of birdwatching – before breakfast
On our second morning, we’d arranged for one of the lodge staff to take us on a short birdwatching walk in the grounds of the lodge. I’m so glad we got up early and had a chance to catch the magical sight of the mist over the lake. The birdwatching was a bonus!
Birds we spotted included: Baglafect Weaver, Copper sunbird, Black-crowned Tchagra, Fan-tailed Widowbird, White-browed Robinchat, African Fish Eagle, Red-billed Firefinch, Tawny flanked Prinia.
African Firefinch “like posho” said our guide. “You often see them congregating outside houses where people are washing their plates.”
We listened to two different types of monkey: the Vervet and the black-and-white Colobus, who were chattering and communicating with each other from different sides of the lake. The guide told us that baby Colobus are born with white fur.
He also explained the medicinal uses of the Omunyara tree and the ‘Five-fingered leaf plant.’
More activities at Kyaninga Lodge
There are a range of massages and beauty treatments available.
To explore the area further, the lodge can organise:
- – Walks in the Great Rift Valley – at the edge of the escarpment you can see the vast expanse which is the convergence of the Congo basin and the Great Rift Valley.
- – Mountain biking to Semliki Safari Lodge.
- – Kyaninga Lodge is a convenient base for exploring Kibale Forest, Semliki National Park, Queen Elizabeth National Park and the Rwenzori Mountains.
- – Visit Toro Botanical Gardens in Fort Portal and the Toro Golf Club, a nine-hole golf course which is open to non-members.
Can you dance? Would you like lessons from a pro?
The second ‘So Kyaninga can dance’ was held in 2017. The event was held on Kyaninga Lodge‘s purpose-built dancefloor.
Can you run? Swim? Cycle?
Another popular event held at Kyaninga Lodge is the Kyaninga Triathlon. Read about all the sporting events on this blog post, which I update every year.
Before I sign off…
To enquire about lodge availability, email info@kyaningalodge.com or call +256 772 999750. Remember to say the muzungu sent you 😎
Bwindi Impenetrable Forest National Park
Bwindi Impenetrable Forest National Park – no. 1 for mountain gorilla trekking, no. 1 in Africa for birding too!
We pay a lot of lip service to ‘protecting the rainforest’ and here it is: a magical, mystical misty place. The first time I visited Bwindi Impenetrable Forest, I felt a strong emotional pull. My first sight of Bwindi’s rainforest made me want to cry.
View of Bwindi Impenetrable Forest as we ascended from Ivy River up to Nkuringo. Click on the image to read my blog about crossing the forest from Buhoma to Nkuringo – it was an amazing experience!
The forest’s wildlife also includes chimpanzees, forest elephants, duikers, Red-tailed monkeys and hundreds of mammals. Forest butterflies are particularly beautiful.
Enkima – my totem the Red tailed monkey – Bwindi Impenetrable Forest. Click on the image to read my blog “Eye to eye with my totem”
The African Bird Club has ranked Bwindi Impenetrable Forest the number one site for birding in Africa.
According to Keith Betton, Chairman of the African Bird Club:“No fewer than 23 of Uganda’s 24 Albertine Rift endemic species are found here including globally threatened species such as African Green Broadbill Pseudocalyptomena graueri and Shelley’s Crimsonwing Cryptospiza shelleyi, plus others such as Kivu Ground-Thrush Zoothera (piaggiae) tanganjicae, Oberlaender’s Ground-Thrush Zoothera oberlaenderi, Dwarf Honeyguide Indicator pumilio, Lagden’s Bush-Shrike Malacanotus lagdeni and Chapin’s Flycatcher Muscicapa lendu.”
Welcome to Bwindi Impenetrable Forest National Park. Bwindi hiking. Photo David Tumusiime
While you’re in Bwindi, take time to go on a village walk. “The Batwa Experience” gives you an insight into the traditional way of life of the Batwa (‘pygmy’) people who lived in the forest for 60,000 years. The Batwa’s ancient forest lifestyle is unique and the community fragile.
Did you know… the mountain gorilla population once numbered just 254 individuals? Thanks to gorilla tourism, their numbers have stabilised. However, they remain endangered (the official term used by IUCN).
10 little-known things to do in Arua, West Nile
Here’s the muzungu’s guide on how to travel to Arua, 10 things to do in Arua and West Nile, all about Arua town, what to buy in Arua market – and the best times of year to travel.
The Muzungu writes: I first visited Arua in 2016. That trip to the far north west of Uganda would not have been possible without the guidance of Gerard Iga. He is the ‘go to’ guide for Arua and West Nile. In 2022, I revisited. The town has seen a number of changes, in particular: new roads and a huge new shopping centre in the middle of the town. I haven’t updated all the restaurant and hotel recommendations in this blog post yet but, as ever, if you have a question just send me a message.
Special thanks to my friend Harriet Fowler who gave me a return Eagle Air ticket to Arua!
Flight to Arua from Entebbe with Eagle Air
The Victoria Nile flows down from Lake Victoria through Lake Kyoga via Karuma Falls and thundering down over the famous Murchison Falls. Heading north, the water becomes known as the Albert Nile, and flows from Lake Albert on through South Sudan, Sudan, Ethiopia and Egypt.
If you like aerial photos, check out the Air Photo Archive of Settlement and Agriculture, Rural Uganda 1963, created by Walter Deshler, University of Maryland.
The land below remains surprisingly green as we headed north. Superficially at least, not much seems to have changed west of Pakwach in 50 years!
I could see no brick constructions and no tarmac roads, just dirt roads as far as the eye could see and the very occasional tin roof. Not a vehicle in sight. I could make out the occasional person on a bicycle on the red dust roads.
Borassus Palms are one of the distinguishing trees of the north bank of the Nile, their seeds carried from Sudan in the stomachs of wandering elephants, and later expelled to transform the environment.
Eagle Air flight to Arua. Landing from @CharlieBeau Diary of a Muzungu on Vimeo.
We had a very easy landing at Arua Airstrip. Watch the short clip to the end – how delightful to see the schoolchildren watching the plane land! Pretty as a picture.
About Arua – a great town!
Arua: think ‘Fort Portal without the hills’. We’re talking calm, clean and organised, with a touch of retro, thanks to the colonial architecture.
I travelled with friends from Kampala and Nairobi. We were all impressed by Arua. Many friends had not visited for a decade or more and noticed huge changes in the town.
Arua is a cosmopolitan town, heavily influenced by its proximity to DRC and South Sudan. Apparently the Congolese of eastern DRC do more trade with Kampala than they do with Kinshasa, their own capital.
There are many forex shops in town. Arua also benefits from the many NGO offices, including Red Cross, Welt Hunger and others, here for humanitarian work in South Sudan.
Cars are few in Arua. You have to feel sorry for the abused vehicles: overloaded trucks carry 30 men at a time.
Gerard and Charlotte take a boda boda motorbike ride through Arua town, West Nile, Uganda from @CharlieBeau Diary of a Muzungu on Vimeo.
While the road tarmac is in good condition, you can see the poverty as you drive north, up to the South Sudan border. The road is lined with thatched huts. Mabati tin roofs are few and far between (showing how little money there is in the area).
Arua town has colonial buildings such as the Post Office style that is common to Kampala, Fort Portal and elsewhere. There is a Public Library too.
The small town has a population of 62,000, with 785,000 in the District. Apparently the late emeritus Bishop of West Nile developed many projects for the local community during his 30 years in office.
“And we should remember they produced a president!” My friend Daniel added, when we were trying to work out why Arua is such a thriving town.
West Nile has historically been isolated, both physically and politically, from the rest of Uganda. There is only one road bridge that crosses Nile (at Pakwach) to connect the region with the rest of the country although there are lesser used ferry crossings.
Former President Idi Amin was born in West Nile (his mother was from Arua and his father was from Koboko). During Amin’s reign, local people are said to have benefited but post-Amin, they were punished politically and economically.
To read more about the history of West Nile, read Dark past to glimmering future; the West Nile you never knew! One day, with an investment in facilities and itineraries, I can imagine tourists visiting the region just to learn more about this period of Uganda’s history.
10 little-known things to do in Arua
1. Take a walk to the top of Arua Hill for a panoramic view of the town
2. Eat local food
Market Lane in Arua has a good number of restaurants serving goat’s meat, beef, chicken, smoked dried fish with g’nut [groundnut/peanut] sauce.
“What food will you take with it?” In Uganda, ‘food’ is specifically the starchy stuff like rice, kalo, matooke, sweet potato and chapatis. Side dishes [no jokes please] include tasty osubi, finely chopped greens, prepared with gnut sauce and rock salt.
The Still Baghdad Restaurant in Arua does a good beef pilau rice – with enough chunks of beef to satisfy a Kenyan!
3. Enjoy the live Congolese music at Club Matonge
The Congo is just a short drive from Arua, meaning the town is a great place to hear Congolose musicians perform. Club Matonge is a ‘free to enter’ outdoor bar. (The bar doesn’t serve spirits, just beer and wine from a box). We spent a couple of hours here. When the band realised we had Kenyans in our crowd, the singers launched into some classic Swahili songs. Our friends from Nairobi reminisced!
4. Go clubbing at Vino Lounge
Vino is the place to hang out, particularly on Friday nights. It gets packed! Club entrance is free.
Everyone had told us we had to check this place out. It’s a late night / all night club, with several bars. Head for Galaxy, the VIP section, on the 2nd floor to get away from (some of) the crowds. These guys can DRINK! OMG. We’re talking neat spirits.
5. Eat at Café Cosmo, Arua’s best café and restaurant
Open 11 to 11 every day, Café Cosmo is very affordable, has good service and a great menu of international, Indian and local African food. This popular restaurant is frequented by Indians, UGs, expats, everyone. [2022, the pandemic plus construction of the new mall have changed things].
Sham the chef’s ‘Cosmo Bites’ include the freshest beef samosas ever. Indian dishes include tandoori and a scrumptious chicken tikka. ‘Afro favourites’ include goat stew and chicken pilao. Fridays and Saturdays, Cosmo make pizzas including a tikka paneer one! I’ll try that on my next trip 🙂
The very friendly Martin recommends C.F.C. the ‘Cosmo Fried Chicken’ [geddit?] Café Cosmo is opposite the URA building on Pakwach Road.
6. Oasis 247 bar and restaurant is open every day
Karaoke nights, quiz nights and pool competitions make this a popular hang-out. Oasis is a good bar for beer promotions and music videos.
7. Walk round the back streets of Arua to see the Hindu Temple
The striking red wall enclosing Arua’s Hindu temple. The ladies here are selling sweet potato seedlings
8. Visit Arua’s markets. The muzungu’s shopping suggestions
- Kitenge material from the Congo
- Termite mushrooms – click here for A Kitchen in Uganda’s Curry Termite Mushroom Soup recipe!
- Groundnuts in their shells
- Shea butter (locally farmed)
- Sim sim sesame seeds
- Sugarcane
- Jackfruit (peeled into bitesize pieces)
- Pineapple (chopped into long chunks)
- Dried enswa white ants – don’t forget to ask for the recipe!
- Salt-dried Angara fish
- Wooden mortar and pestle
- … and bucket after bucket of dried beans of different colours
9. Visit Miriadua Falls along the Arua – Koboko road
Gerard Iga writes: “I have a personal attachment to this one since it was my very own uncle that named the falls after himself. He was the county chief of Maracha in colonial times. When he went to visit this place, he asked the locals what the falls were called and they said “Iyi Kuru” which literally means “rough flowing waters”. Since all over Lugbara land, such falls are called iyi kuru, he decided to name them after himself and that is the name by which the place is known everywhere else except the locality. There, people still call it iyi kuru.”
Miriadua Falls are a 20 minute journey outside Arua Town.
10. Enter inside Uganda’s smallest church! Near Goli, Nebbi
Imagine … a church that “can only accommodate three people, including the preacher.” What a great place to get married (and keep down the cost of your wedding!)
I’d heard rumours that this is “the smallest church in the world” but I can’t seem to verify it – it certainly is petite though, according to my travel writer friend Solomon Oleny. The muzungu failed to reach… the church on Biku Hill is near Nebbi, a good hour’s travel from Arua.
How to get to Arua, West Nile
Fly to Arua
Currently, Eagle Air is the only operator to fly scheduled flights to Arua. They fly 3 times a week between Entebbe and Arua.
They are efficient in person e.g. at Kampala office in Portal Avenue. Tel +256 (0)414 344292 / +256 (0)772 777338/7 and +256 (0)752 793860.
The new airstrip should be a real boon for trade with the DRC. Will commercial flights open up West Nile to tourism too? I heard rumours of Kenya Airways and RwandAir… let’s see!
Take the bus to Arua
A number of bus companies supply Arua with daily services. Generally, the standard daytime bus costs 30k UGX and the executive (overnight) bus costs 50k. They all depart from Arua Park, downtown Kampala. Contacts in Arua recommend the executive Gaaga bus which runs overnight and has reclining seats. KKT are ‘more reliable than Gaaga’ according to another source. California bus company started up last year. Nile Coach is an old school provider that ‘overpacks vehicles.’ [2022 there are new bus providers].
If your bus (or car) stops at Kafu, en route to Arua, think twice before you eat the roasted ‘muchomo’ meat!
How to get around Arua town
Bodas in Arua are cheap and everywhere. If you don’t have the right money, you won’t have to argue to get your change. Refreshing. (I am constantly overcharged in Kampala!)
Arua is a very pleasant town to walk around. Main roads have good wide pavements (and the boda drivers do not seem to drive on them either!)
In 2016, the 4km taxi journey from the airport cost me 10,000 ugx. By boda, it cost me just 2,000 UGX.
When to visit Arua
Arua is at an altitude of 1,200 metres meaning nights can be cooler than in most places in Uganda.
Generally expect:
April to June – lighter rains; August – cold, day and night; August to October – heavier rains;
December to Feb / March – cold mornings, very hot in the day, warm at night.
A few words of Lugbara, one of the local languages
Mi efu ngoni – good morning [mifun-GO-ney]
Mi ngoni – how are you? [min-GO-ney]
Awadifo – thanks [awad-if-O]
I love exploring new parts of Uganda and learning a few words of local language. But in West Nile, as soon as I got the hang of greeting somebody in Lugbara, I was told that we were in a different district where a whole range of other languages and dialects are spoken!
Awadifo!
I was drawn to the northern region of West Nile and Arua town by the lure of a tourism ‘familiarisation’ trip. I really had a great time.
Thanks to Kampala House Harriers (KH3) for finally getting me to Arua – an invitation I most definitely could not ignore! My Arua trip included three days of fun supplied by KH3. Read that story here “Nagawa – you cowardised!” A detour via the Congo.
A big thank you to Dolorence Were of USDC Uganda Society for Disabled Children for letting me transfer the Eagle Air ticket (that my friend won in the USDC fundraiser raffle) into my name.
Have you visited Arua? When was the last time you visited ? What are your favourite things to do in Arua?
“Nagawa – you cowardised!” A detour via the Congo
Adventure in West Nile – and beyond
There were two international highlights to our trip to West Nile. The silly Muzungu was to miss one of them!
On Saturday morning, we took the smooth tarmac road from Arua, heading north towards the border with South Sudan. We passed few vehicles on our two hour journey. We drove through Koboko, location of the Amin family home.
Although Hashers had been disappointed to learn we wouldn’t be able to cross into South Sudan, the reasons why were quite apparent once we got to the Oraba border. Queues of young Sudanese refugees, mostly women, young children and teenagers, stood in orderly lines waiting to register with humanitarian agencies. A gigantic World Food Programme tent sat one side of the road. In front were lines of buses and piles of bags and bedding. The whole scene seemed calm and orderly; apparently we arrived on a quiet day. Generally 1,500 refugees enter Uganda via this border every day.
Uganda’s friendliest policeman
Nagawa and Kampala Hash House Harriers meet Uganda’s friendliest policeman. At the Oraba border with South Sudan. Behind us is ‘no man’s land’ between the two countries
Uganda’s friendliest policeman explained that there is no trade with South Sudan. Even the petrol tankers that we saw driving across the border were actually destined to cross into the DRC a couple of kilometres ahead. He explained that on the other side of the border, things were quiet but the real trouble was further north.
There is no discernible difference to the buildings and huts on either side of the border. My few days stay in Arua gave me a better appreciation of the historically mixed communities and tribes in West Nile, South Sudan and the DRC.
Kampala Hash House Harriers walk down to no man’s land at the Oraba border with South Sudan
The policeman explained that the river is the natural boundary between Uganda and South Sudan. He pointed to where the Congolese border is, 4 or 5 km away. Although the official border is Oraba, it is of course “very porous” meaning you can’t police every field and bush. (So how many people are really coming into Uganda from South Sudan?)
Tripping over goats
I would say the people of Oraba were very surprised to see 20 or more Hashers in bright pink T-shirts tripping over goats in their backyards!
I love jerry cans! All lined up at the water pump. Oraba border, West Nile
I wasn’t running that day so every few minutes, the runners would stop, let me catch them up, then they would run off again for a few minutes. We repeated this several times… until…
We must have been running / Hashing / walking for an hour before it really started raining. I was carrying my phone and camera in a cotton bag which I stuffed up inside my T-shirt. I wrapped my arms around my stomach and put my head down to try and avoid the worst of the heavy rain. My glasses quickly misted up so I just focused on putting one foot in front of the other.
The rain became heavier and heavier. If someone had called out to me, I would never have heard them above the sound of the rain. In Kampala, I would have quickly looked for shelter (like a bar!) but I was in the middle of the bush. There were cracks of thunder overhead. Standing under a tree wasn’t really an option.
I saw no-one: no Hashers, no bright pink T-shirts, no villagers. There were no vehicles, no boda bodas, no bicycles. Just the goddam rain and bush.
I walked on for what seemed like ages. There were no signs of any chalk marks to show the Hash route. The rivers of rainwater running over the tops of my trainers told me that the chalk marks were long gone.
I just kept walking. What else could I do?
I was totally soaked, but the heavy rain wasn’t subsiding. How long could I go on like this?
Typical thatched hut in a village at Oraba border, West Nile
I realised that we had definitely walked more than 5 km since leaving Oraba – remembering the policeman’s words, I wondered: were those the 5 km that were going to lead me into the Congo? There’s a thought: where the hell am I? If I accidentally cross into the Congo, who will know? If the muzungu can’t make herself understood here in the village, how will I communicate with someone deeper in the bush? Will my phone network work if I accidentally cross the border?
I got a bit despondent at this point. Had the others forgotten me? Had they turned off halfway down the hill while I had marched up ahead in the wrong direction?
I approached a homestead of large square thatched huts. I didn’t know whether to go forward or back. Instead I stood under a small tree, contemplating what to do…
Jajja to the rescue!
An old lady beckoned me over.
She waved her arm at me and invited me into her hut. She produced a blue plastic chair for me to sit in the middle of her large hut, bare but for a chicken scraping at the dirt floor. Five young children stood around staring at the Muzungu wringing out her sopping wet hair.
The rain eventually stopped.
I asked Jajja where Oraba was. She pointed right and then she pointed left. Hmmm… in two opposite directions!
I decided to turn left which put me back on the same path I had been on before. I called Hashmistress who said they had a problem seeing the turning as well. (That did not give me much confidence. I had walked with my head down – who knows how many turnings I had passed during that time?) She added that I just needed to “look out for a cassava field and an upturned pot.” Roughly translated this may equate to ‘branch at the pawpaw tree’ in Hash-speak, especially to a Muzungu who lives in Kampala and can’t tell her cassava from her yam! (Did I mention something about feeling despondent?)
I carried on walking. I looked left and right. I didn’t think I had passed any cassava, I certainly had not seen an upturned pot.
Then I hit what can only be described as a road. Surely Hashmistress would have told me if I was about to reach a T-junction intersection with a road?
Breaking all the rules
And then I heard something. I couldn’t believe I was hearing it. I was so lost in my little world in the middle of nowhere, that it took me a few seconds to work out what the noise was.
It was a boda boda!
I almost ran towards him.
And then I broke my own rule. Normally I discriminate and only go with the mzee, the oldest boda boda driver. This time I jumped on the first boda boda I saw.
A young boy filled up the motorbike engine with some petrol from an old water bottle and we were on our way bumping down the marram roads, the wind blowing through the muzungu’s wet hair.
I knew that I would regret this decision. I knew that KH3 would be merciless with me for cheating!
“Oraba” I said. “Is it far?” I asked the boda guy.
“It’s a bit close,” came the answer.
If I’d taken a guess, I would have taken the right direction but the 15 minute boda boda journey would have been a lot more on that dodgy foot.
Luckily my camera had survived the downpour so I had a chance to film this! Look out for: the man carrying a bed on his head… the men leading a cow to market … the men thatching a hut! Look closely and you may catch a young boy waving at the muzungu…
Boda boda motorbike tour through the villages and countryside of West Nile, northern Uganda. The villagers walk to market from @CharlieBeau Diary of a Muzungu on Vimeo.
“Nagawa* – you cowardised!” Said Ki Love Love
Back at the main road, I had expected to see everyone there waiting for me. I had been worried that I would be holding up the bus. I couldn’t believe it took them more than an hour to join us, while I shivered in my freezing wet T-shirt. I stood next to the slowly barbecuing goat and hugged the heat coming off it. It’s many a year since I’ve been that cold.
Petrol tanker waiting to cross Oraba border, West Nile, into South Sudan. Final destination DR Congo. In the distance is South Sudan
A regular hash is just one hour, these guys ran for 3 ½ hours. Where had they been?
To the DRC!
To South Sudan!
Everyone apart from me made it to the tripartite border, a point where Uganda converges with the DRC and South Sudan.
Without Nagawa! Eh banange! I was gutted.
What kind of a travel blogger gets lost and misses the international highlight of the trip?!
… NOTE: During my West Nile adventures, I stayed in Arua. I love this town. Read my blog ’10 little-known things to do in Arua, West Nile.’
Downtown dreadlocks. The muzungu’s blind date
What did I say to Julia?
After one dating disaster too many I joked that “if another guy with dreadlocks wants to date me, the first thing he has to do is shave his head.”
Moving on, a few months go by and the girls were having a giggle… Elisabeth wanted to set me up on a blind date with a friend of hers.
“Teddy works in a salon,” she told me. “You can just drop by one day, and check him out first. He won’t know. He’s fed up going out with Ugandan girls who keep messing him around. He said he fancies going out with a Muzungu.”
We checked him out, surreptitiously. My friend gave him my phone number. He called me.
“I just wondered what you’re doing tomorrow? I’ll be in Kampala,” he said.
“Call me when you get to the taxi park. I’ll be at the saloon by the bus station,” he added.
Lunchtime on a downtown Kampala street and the streets are fairly quiet
As I got off the boda boda downtown the next day, half a dozen men from different upcountry bus companies ran towards me and demanded to know where I was going: Lira, Gulu, Masaka, Soroti, where….?
“I’m going to the salooooon,” I answered. (A salon in English, in Uglish it’s a saloon.]
I’m an independent kind of girl so I didn’t call Teddy straightaway; I just thought I’d see whether I could find him first.
A couple of people helpfully offered to guide me to a saloon of their recommendation. He wasn’t in the first one.
Would I recognise him?
In the second salon, I saw a man having his head shaved. Were the dreadlocks coming off? Had he read my mind? Had he read ‘that blog’? Had Julia told him he would have to shave his head? The man’s head was bent forward, so I couldn’t see his face. All I could see were the last two inches of hair being removed by the razor.
The man lifted up his head. It wasn’t Teddy.
Two saloons later and I still hadn’t found him.
In the bustling street, a young man in an orange T-shirt tapped me on the shoulder. I was going to ignore him but he said my name out loud. He introduced himself as Teddy’s brother.
I followed him through the crowded streets into a crammed shopping arcade where we climbed up three flights of stairs. (How would I ever have found this saloon on my own?) And there was Teddy, sitting on the balcony, grinning at me. “I’ve been watching you from up here,” he said.
Guess what? He was having his dreadlocks redone!
A very Ugandan first date. At the hair salon
And you seriously call this a date?
We had some general chitchat and he offered me a soda. We sat and chatted while his brother worked on his hair.
On the salon veranda, overlooking the buses, we ordered lunch: beans, rice, cassava and matooke. He laughed when I said in Luganda “Silya enyama” (I don’t eat meat).
A cooked Ugandan lunch comes in one size only: BIG!
The lady from the restaurant looked very impressed that the Muzungu was eating the big plate of “black African food” she’d brought into the saloon for us.
Teddy’s brother encouraged me to clear my plate. “No leftovers or they’ll charge us more,” he quipped.
“I love the UK so much! I love the Queen!” Said Teddy.
Was this supposed to impress me? “Why do you love the Queen?” Quizzed the Muzungu.
“I am a prince.” [Perplexed look on the Muzungu’s face….]
“I know a Prince,” I jumped in, looking for the logic. Was he trying to tell me he’s a monarchist? (I never did get to the bottom of that one).
He next explained that his dad and his sister live in the UK. He showed me a message from his dad saying that he should get a green card for the US. Why he showed me this, I don’t know. [And where did he think I was really from?]
“Trust me with u’r stayle” hair salon, near Mubende, Uganda
We talked a bit about music. “What music do you like? Elton John?” He enquired.
Oh pleeeease. Why do so many Ugandans live in this 1980s musical timewarp? It drives me nuts. (Yes Elton John is an amazing singer/ songwriter but forgive me Elton, your heyday was 30 years ago).
After lunch, Teddy explained that he had left his money at home – a pretty impressive move for a first date.
He said he wanted to buy us lunch, but “could I lend him 5,000 shillings?” [Approx $1.50 / £1.00]
I decided not to make a scene. Lending him money on our first date wasn’t what I had in mind. However, since it would cost me at least this much to eat lunch anywhere else in town, I handed over the 5,000 shillings. He said he would pay me back that afternoon. (Afterwards I asked myself: why didn’t he just ask his brother to pay for lunch?)
Time went by. We ran out of conversation. I looked up at the TV.
His brother noticed I was getting bored and asked me if I’d like to read a magazine, and produced some old copies of African Woman: dated 2006.
What am I doing here? I asked myself…
The average Ugandan seems to spend a lot of their life just sitting around. I can’t do it. This was a work day and I’d come into town – just to meet him. I asked Teddy what he was planning to do for the rest of the day. He said he would be another couple of hours and then he was going to look for 10,000 shillings from one place and 20,000 from another. I told him I had some work to do.
He said he would call me to see about meeting up later. (Could I be bothered… ?)
“My sister!”
To choruses of “my sister” and “jajja,” I worked my way down the street towards Owino market.
The strap of my sandal broke. “Those sandals must be Chinese!” Said a man sitting outside a shop. As I hobbled along, people looked down at the muzungu’s broken sandal, smiled and said “bambi” and “sorry” as the Muzungu limped on by.
A boda driver called out at me “I give you a lift!” A cloud of dust lifted in the air as he SMACKED the seat of his motorbike, in anticipation of the muzungu’s kabina.
Across the road, a man with a handful of T-shirts beckoned me.
“Here is the tailor,” he said.
The shy tailor – cobbler – was delighted for me to take his photo. Fixing my sandals outside Owino market, Kampala
Just outside the entrance to Owino, next to the open sewer, an old man sat hunched under a big umbrella fixing shoes in the dust. He gave me a wooden stool to sit on, a perfect vantage point for watching men on the opposite bank of the sewer playing dominoes and urinating against the wall.
Within minutes, my sandal was expertly fixed, for just 2,000 Uganda shillings (not the 20,000 shillings some chancer tried to rob me of another time!)
I went into town looking for love. Instead, I got a shy smile from the old cobbler.
Actually, I couldn’t have been happier.
Not the best view in Kampala but certainly the best shoe repair prices!
STOP PRESS: I hear that Teddy has lost the dreads. I did agree to see him a second time – but this time he bounced, his phone went off and I didn’t get a call or explanation for a whole week. Some people are so unserious!
Beware the Travellers’ Health Book! Tropical disease diary
Beware the Travellers’ Health Book! Tropical disease diary – Uganda travel health advice from the muzungu
Or … “How not to do it”
This month I have been bitten by Mango Flies and a spider. I have had Malaria and Scabies, a fungal infection and an allergic reaction… what have you been doing, you may ask?
The silly Muzungu thought she would try and save money by consulting her Travellers Health book for Uganda travel health advice. I’d been itching like crazy, two evenings in a row and it felt like the surface of my skin was crawling alive. “Itching, particularly bad at night” was found in the Scabies section of the book. The next morning, I walked down to the local pharmacist and then to the local clinic for a diagnosis.
I was trying to go local. I like supporting local businesses and, after all, isn’t a Ugandan more likely to know what afflicts somebody who lives in Uganda? So went the thinking…
Three diagnoses later, plus a concoction of antihistamines, fungicide treatment, and other treatments – and I was still itching like crazy.
It wasn’t Scabies.
Nor had I been suffering from Mango Fly bites.
I thought it highly unlikely that I could possibly have Malaria a third time in six months. After all, Dr Stockley tells us “you can’t get Malaria in Kampala.”
When I told him that I thought I’d caught Malaria in Ggaba, he said: “Yes, well that’s Ggaba, that’s not Kampala!”
I always err on the side of caution, so when I got sick I decided I better have one more Malaria test. At the local clinic, I was surprised to hear I had the third positive result in four months, although I hear positive results are not that easy to get. (Even if you do have Malaria, it often hides in your organs and doesn’t show up in the test).
I’d been a bit suspicious of said clinic. They first tried to sell me a cream that was almost out of date. Obviously disappointed that I didn’t want to buy that, the clinic then tried to sell me something else for a condition that never even got a mention during the consultation!
I won’t be going there again, especially when I later had a conclusive result from Nakasero Hospital that proved I could not possibly have had Malaria when I had my test two days previously at the local pharmacy. In fact, a tropical medicine doctor friend says the antigen test for malaria shows I can’t have had it in the last six months…
And what was it that I had in the end?
Nothing tropical, only a case of Shingles, finally diagnosed by the Surgery. A British nurse friend had suggested I might have Shingles, but the two local clinics refuted that suggestion. Shingles is brought on by stress. It’s not contagious, but if you have had chickenpox as a child, you risk developing it later in life.
In my effort to save money, I’d actually wasted money by taking medications for something that I didn’t even have. I had prolonged my illness too.
Learn from the muzungu’s experience. When you feel ill, go to the best doctor you can afford – straightaway (and ditch the Travellers Health Book!)
Are you new to Uganda? You might find this blog useful: How to avoid Malaria.
Do you have any other Uganda travel tips or expat travel advice you’d like to share?
Please leave a comment here or check out the Diary of a Muzungu Guest Post page for more information, I’d love to hear from you!
Airport drama # 1- “The plane is closing!”
If I’m honest, I’ve lived on ‘African time’ before I lived in Africa… but even when I make a timely plan, something seems to crop up to delay me.
‘African time’ and international flight departures do not mix. This is just one of the muzungu’s series of airport dramas! This one took place at Entebbe International Airport, Uganda.
This time I thought I was prepared.
I was at the airport on time.
I had looked at the Emirates website but could not work out how much I would be charged for the additional luggage I was taking home for a friend. I had therefore guessed I would just pay an extra $50 per bag (the amount I’ve paid with other airlines). All I saw was a note on their web site saying that because the connecting flight was provided by a third party, I would have to take the bags to the airport and pay the excess baggage fee there.
At Entebbe International Airport, a man called Ken very helpfully shrink-wrapped my four bags into just three. (I thought this would be a good ploy for outwitting the system, and hoped that I would just be charged for three excess bags not four).
I was rather pleased with myself.
At the check-in desk, I somehow lifted the bags onto the weighing scale. They registered a total of 44 kg.
“That will be $960 please Madam.”
“What?!” I blurted out.
$960? She even said it with a straight face.
“You must be joking!” I slammed back at her. “I don’t have that kind of money, so what am I supposed to do?”
She was totally unhelpful.
I tried to bargain with her but she said once it had registered on the system, there was no negotiation. I searched her face for an answer.
“You can just give it away or throw it,” she said.
And then I saw red.
I had been willing to pay one hundred dollars or so for extra baggage but after the way she talked to me, I decided I wasn’t going to give the airline a single extra dollar.
“The plane is closing!” Shouted one of the airport staff. So much for my normal view that ‘Ugandans are so friendly’, these two ladies and a gentlemen were particularly unhelpful.
“I tried to pay for the excess baggage online but there was no information!” I shouted back at them.
I then proceeded to claw apart my beautifully shrink-wrapped bags.
In a panic, I ran over to Ken and begged for his help. He obliged with a razor blade and delicately sliced through our 20 minutes of wrapping. (I just hoped he wasn’t going to slice straight through the canvas material of the bag as well!)
What to take with me? What to leave behind?
I broke out into a sweat as I tried to quickly decide what to leave and what to take with me. My friend had paid for my air ticket; I couldn’t leave his stuff behind. But what was I going to wear for my three weeks away if I just took his stuff?
“I can’t afford to miss another plane. My family will never let me live it down!” I thought to myself.
Knickers and bras flew left and right, much to the hilarity of the staff, as I panicked my way through my bags. (What a great time for them to regain their sense of humour – at the Muzungu’s expense…) Isn’t it funny how I didn’t laugh with them?
My driver wasn’t picking my call; he had gone to attend a burial. There was no way I could speak to him and arrange for him to come back and collect my stuff before I got onto the plane and switched my phone off.
Decisions, decisions…
“Ken,” I asked him, “can I trust you?”
There was nothing else to do but to trust this guy. I certainly wasn’t going to ditch my stuff in the airport for the unhelpful staff to take home.
I handed over a 20,000 Uganda shilling note – and two bags full of my personal belongings and my friend’s expensive whiskey – with phone numbers of a couple of friends who I hoped would follow up for me.
As I rushed towards the plane, Ken came running after me to check I had written the phone numbers down correctly. He seemed honest enough.
… And then I sat on the plane twiddling my thumbs for half an hour! (All the time worrying what I had left behind, and whether I would see any of it ever again)
The long-term effect of the momentary madness at Entebbe was felt throughout my trip: I was to realise 24 hours later that, in the pandemonium, I had left behind my phone recharger and my laptop recharger.
A big thank you to Honest Ken. He helped me in my hour of need and everything was still in my bag when my driver picked it up from Entebbe the next day!
If you enjoyed the image of the Muzungu panicking, write me a comment below. Airport drama # 2 is not far behind!
Have you seen my aerial photos of Lake Victoria and Kisoro? Taken on board domestic flights with Aerolink.
More ‘lunatic’ than ‘express’ – a train ride through history
Have you travelled on the Lunatic Express?
This is the muzungu’s personal account of the ‘Lunatic Express’ train journey from Nairobi to Mombasa, Kenya, an epic adventure bar none! Read all about East Africa’s railway history, Tsavo’s man-eating lions and the muzungu’s train survival tips.
- – No. of KM journey: 530
- – No. of Kenyan shillings for 2nd class ticket: 3,385 (USD 33)
- – No. of hours delay leaving Nairobi Railway Station: 10
- – No. of hours on train journey (forecast): 13
- – No. of hours on train journey (actual): 23
- – No. of degrees Celsius on the train: 40+
- – No. of beers consumed: not enough
- – No. of National Parks traversed for free: 2
- – No. of elephants seen on Tsavo safari: 3
The name should have been warning enough… yet, behind every travel nightmare is the makings of a good travel blog. (Oh, the situations the muzungu gets herself into in the search for a good story!)
We travelled in the light of the Full Moon or should I say: we travelled under the effects of the full moon. Lunacy indeed!
What made the Muzungu want to embark on this notorious train journey?
My ride on Kampala’s passenger train service made me want to discover more of East Africa’s rail network, and its history.
Daydreaming about my next train adventure gave me a reason to plan a trip to Kenya’s coast: the first leg from Kampala to Nairobi was by bus (although once upon a time, you could do the whole trip by train). I knew that one day passengers would again be able to cross East Africa by train but before that happened, I wanted to experience the original Lunatic Express train – so I could compare it with the new one. Of romance and railways is my follow-up story, written 2018, and compares the Lunatic Express, the bus and the Standard Gauge Railway! But first…
What is the Lunatic* Express?
Although the entire 660 mile (just over 1000 km) length of the Uganda Railway actually runs through Kenya – from Mombasa to Kisumu on the Kenyan shores of Lake Victoria – the railway derives its name from its final destination: Uganda. Sources states that the purpose of the railway was “to protect British colonial interests from the Germans.” The fact that the Uganda Railway opened up trade across Uganda and Kenya was simply a ‘by the way.’
Charles Miller came up with the term ‘Lunatic Express’ in his 1971 book The Lunatic Express: An Entertainment in Imperialism to describe the challenges – and calamities – of the Uganda Railway’s construction, notably:
- – 2,500 (of 32,000 workmen) died during construction, mostly from disease
- – 28 Indian “coolies” (‘workers’ to you and me) were killed by the man-eating lions of Tsavo
- – 135 African laborers were also killed by said Tsavo man-eaters. It’s interesting that 28 is generally the number of people recorded as killed by lions. However, according to Ugandans at Heart / ‘EKB’ Ekitibwa Kya Buganda “the Africans were considered not important enough for an accurate count or record to be kept.” The actual toll of all men killed by lions must therefore be 163+ /- [scroll down for more about those pesky pussy cats…]
- Very demanding terrain
- Lack of water / drought
- “Hostile natives” (hardly bloody surprising)
- Derailments and collisions
*A lunatic endeavour is something considered to be extremely foolish or eccentric. The word lunatic is derived from the Latin word luna, meaning moon. The Latin word lunaticus means “moon-struck” and a lunatic someone who is “affected with periodic insanity, dependent on the changes of the moon.”
How to book your tickets for the Lunatic Express
The start was very promising. The call to the booking office at Nairobi Railway Station confirmed that it would be cheaper for us to purchase tickets in Nairobi than to buy them in advance online. So far, so good …
Upon arrival at Nairobi Railway Station, the humourless security woman insisted I delete my photos of the front of the station. (Lord knows there must already be enough photos in circulation, what difference would mine make?)
The interior of Nairobi Railway Station is an exact replica of Kampala Railway Station, with all its original features in place. In Nairobi however, someone has tried to give the place a modern facelift, circling the century-old fittings with bright gaudy paint. Not a good look.
Generally, Nairobi Railway Station is in a shocking state of repair. (By contrast, the interiors and platforms of Kampala Railway Station remain in near perfect condition, having been closed to the public for 30 years).
We purchased our Lunatic Express tickets from the wonderfully helpful Evelyn and Elias. My friends opted for a two bunk first class compartment while I opted for second class. Our tickets cost 4,405 KES (approx 43 USD) first class and 3,385 KES (approx 33 USD) second class and included breakfast, lunch and dinner.
The train passes through 530 km (300 miles) of East Africa, from Kenya’s capital Nairobi to the Indian Ocean port of Mombasa. I was most looking forward to traversing Tsavo National Park (now split into East Tsavo and West Tsavo), most famous for the man-eating lions, as many unfortunates were to discover to their peril back in 1898.
The train was forecast to leave at 7 PM on Good Friday. As Evelyn took our booking, she asked for our phone numbers “for when (not if) there is a delay.” I didn’t think much about that; we just booked our tickets and went on our way.
The Lunatic Express: day of our departure
Keen to embark on my first train Safari, I decided to get to the railway station early – unusually for me: several hours early.
In the meantime, Evelyn called my friend Julia to advise of a delay. The train would not depart until 10 PM so we headed into town to kill time in a bar. Generous helpings of goat and ugali later, another phone call advised us: the Lunatic Express departure time was likely to be 11.30 pm or midnight. Needless to say, when we arrived at the station, there was no sign of the train. It had not arrived from Mombasa. A number of very annoyed bazungu tourists requested refunds.
Children were curled up asleep with their parents on hard wooden benches. In the sofa area – in total darkness, thanks to a power cut – a man at a tiny bar served people while holding a small torch. Inside the station was a retro lounge bar of a bygone era.
We were invited to board the train at 3 am. At 5 o’clock in the morning – 10 hours later than the advertised departure time – our train rumbled out of Nairobi Railway Station. The muzungu was curled up asleep in the top bunk of compartment B in coach 2326 by then.
I woke up on a moving train, crossing the savannah.
I had only slept four hours in two days but I was too excited to go back to sleep. What’s more, the compartment was quickly heating up (the weather in Nairobi had been roasting hot). I tried to pull down the window, but it refused to open more than a few inches.
A member of staff walked along the corridor outside my compartment and announced “breakfast will be ready soon.”
“Soon” turned out to be an hour or more later!
Our journey from Nairobi pushed us into a coastal heatwave. Rather than travel in the relative cool of the night, our late departure meant we traversed the 483 km in the heat of the day, our train absorbing every ray of the hot sun.
Kampala and Nairobi had been hotter than normal and I had been dreading the predicted heatwave at the Kenyan coast. However, after 23 hours in our mobile sauna, I felt thoroughly acclimatised!
“There really should be a swimming pool on the roof of the train,” Julia said.
“Don’t you think they should first switch on the ceiling fans, fix the air conditioning and make it possible for us to open the windows?!” I suggested.
Much like Nairobi Railway Station, the Lunatic Express train is in a state of total neglect. There were few locks on the toilet doors, none on compartments (except when inside) and just two power sockets per carriage.
Yet there were glimpses of the train’s former splendour. Although from the outside, the Lunatic Express is a non-descript modern train, the interior features wooden benches, some 1930s-style fittings, cup holders and other metal fittings engraved with Rft Valley Railway, faded old posters and the occasional piece of original silver tableware.
My favourite piece of tableware was the metal butter dish. I loved its air of faded opulence. Julia removed the lid to reveal a messy dollop of cheap Blue Band margarine. Humph!
Travel on the Lunatic Express is not a gourmet experience
These days, everything about the Lunatic Express is cheap (including the train tickets, if I’m honest). But like they say: “you get what you pay for” and our three meals were basic and not particularly appetising. Dinner was simply a second serving of lunch.
Cooked breakfast (eggs, sausages and baked beans) included cheap sliced white sugary bread (toasted one side only! To save time? To save money?) The weak-tasting coffee was of the instant variety (in Kenya? In one of the world’s major coffee producing countries?) But ignore that: I loved the way the waiters expertly poured our hot beverages from beautiful old tea and coffeepots, while the train rumbled along.
From the train windows, we watched the landscape change as we passed through open countryside, mile after mile, kilometre after kilometre.
We saw the occasional human: a young girl collecting firewood, a man tending a flock of goats and cows.
As we rattled through one of the numerous derelict railway stations and outposts, I observed a woman and baby watching us. People approached our slowly-moving train. A handful of children shouted at us for money.
A safari through Tsavo – and no park fees to pay!
A real draw for me was the chance to experience a train safari – and I was not disappointed.
Tsavo is Kenya’s largest national park and covers nearly 22,000 sq km. It is one of the world’s largest. The construction of the railway split the park into two: Tsavo East National Park and Tsavo West National Park.
Crossing Tsavo, beyond a new viaduct, everyone moved to one side of the train carriage to watch elephants. I also spotted baboons and Thomson’s Gazelles.
We moved too quickly to identify many birds but I couldn’t miss a vibrant Lilac-breasted Roller, and larger bird species like Marabou Storks, and a Chanting Grey Goshawk perched on the roof of a derelict railway building next to the track.
Two children shouted that they had “seen a lion lying in the grass.” Their mother and I exchanged looks of doubt and held back our sniggers.
The story of Tsavo’s man-eating lions is gripping! Keep reading…
How apt. By the light of the Full Moon, the Lunatic Express arrived in Mombasa.
As we sensed our journey coming to an end, Julia and I got a new lease of life. (Or was that the half bottle of vodka in my bag?) We bounced along the train corridor, to and from the buffet car, gently thrown left and right; it was like being on a ship.
I had lost my concept of time… one staff member said we were an hour from Mombasa; another estimated two and a half hours. Everyone – staff included – moped around listlessly in the heat. Few people had phone battery left (for much of the journey there was no phone network anyway).
The shadows of palm tress silhouetted against the moonlit sky waved us “karibu” – WELCOME into the Indian Ocean port of Mombasa.
The marathon endurance trip was finally behind us.
Several very sweaty hours and a few cold beers later, the Lunatic Express arrived at the coast. The advertised 13 hour journey was actually a 43 hour adventure from start to finish.
How to ride a tuk tuk
Thanks to the brilliant Jane Spilsbury at the Watamu Marine Association, we had a booking at Regency Park Hotel. We had a rough idea of how much to pay for a taxi from Mombasa station, thanks to RVR train staff member George, who organized our taxi. We’d bonded with our Norwegian train companions by this stage and shared the phone number of our hotel.
“Do you want to share a taxi with us?” I suggested.
“I’m not sure there will be enough room, will there?” One asked. We were five people with five sets of luggage.
“Let’s see,” I said, “we can try.”
Our lumbering great taxi driver was there on the platform to meet us. We walked towards his taxi … a tuk tuk!
We all laughed out loud. “I think we need another vehicle!” Someone said.
The giant taxi driver proceeded to pack all our bags and all five of us into his miniscule motor. How would our tall friend fit in? He shared the driver’s seat with him – one bum cheek each!
There may have been no red carpet at Mombasa, no fanfare of trumpets, yet we arrived at our hotel in style.
Parting thoughts
No-one can board the Lunatic Express train without seeing its potential and bemoaning the very poor facilities. Back in the day, this would have been a state-of-the-art train experience. All the facilities are there, including air conditioning and announcement system. There are also locks on toilet doors. (Sadly few of these work anymore). Few of the train windows open, even if the muzungu asks a strong man to assist her, and many of the window mosquito nets are torn.
Beyond that, we found the train to be clean enough (even if the bedding was patched in places). The staff were helpful, although there were no explanations for the train’s late arrival in Nairobi, late departure and even later arrival in Mombasa! At certain points our train was stuck moving behind a slow goods train. On other occasions, our train had to pull into sidings to let a goods train pass on the single track.
This train journey really could be a spectacular experience. Let’s hope it will be again when the new Standard Gauge Railway is complete and the rolling stock is upgraded.
For much of the length of the trip, we rolled parallel to the new railway line. Many sections appear to be complete; in other areas, it’s still a construction site.
At the time of writing (2016), the Standard Gauge Railway (SGR) network was set to expand to Uganda, South Sudan and Rwanda. In Uganda, it will comprise of three major routes with a total route length of 1,614km. The SGR will stretch to the DRC border.
End of the line for ‘Lunatic Express?’ Kenya begins multi-billion dollar railway.
How to survive the Lunatic Express! An essential packing list
- – A flexible itinerary
- – African concept of time!
- – GSOH good sense of humour 🙂
- – Toilet paper
- – Soap
- – Hand gel / wipes
- – Mosquito repellent
- – Earplugs
- – Playing cards or other non-electronic amusements – power sockets are hard to find
- – Rechargers / Smartphone power packs
- – A map of East Africa so you can trace your route
- – Snacks
- – Cold beers, sodas and water are available and not expensive.
- – An ice box
- – Strong liquor!
- – Cigarettes? Smokers opened a side door and sat on the steps as we moved slowly along
- – A fan
- – Kichoi (or sarong), flip-flops / sandals, shorts and T-shirts / vests.
- – A mirror! I did not see / use / even thinking of using a mirror on the train (as the photos probably tell!)
- – Contacts for a hotel in Mombasa “for when there is a delay.”
More survival tips for travelling the Lunatic Express
- – The Glory Hotel in Mombasa was recommended to us, but full, so we stayed at Regency Park Hotel. The staff were helpful and the breakfast was generous. Choose from rooms with fans or air conditioning). Pay 300 – 500 KES for a cab/tuk tuk from Mombasa Railway Station.
- – You may think you’re going to save one day by travelling overnight but if the train delays, you are likely to miss that important meeting, flight or even wedding! And if you don’t sleep very well, you will lose a day catching up on sleep as well. I’d say: only take the Lunatic Express train from Nairobi to Mombasa when you have two or three days to spare.
- – Although second class accommodation means four people share a compartment, it is bigger than the first class two-person compartment – and thus allows more air to circulate. Incredibly important if you’re travelling during a heatwave!
- – I later realized only a few passengers got off the train at Mombasa. They must have decided to sleep there until they were chucked off the train (and save renting a hotel room like we did).
- – Shower in the sink – cos there ain’t nothing else!
- – Get to know your travel companions right away. You will surely end up interacting at some point on the journey, so leave behind your sensibilities and connect with them early on. Remember: what happens on the train stays on the train! 😉
Despite the lack of communication, zero explanation and no apology for the delays, we thoroughly enjoyed our adventure on the Lunatic Express train to Mombasa. We maintained our sense of humour throughout!
Thanks to the ever smiling George. He received every complaint with a big smile and ran up and down the train all day and night trying to keep everyone happy.
Are you interested in the history of East Africa’s railways?
Nairobi is the biggest city in East Africa. It is immense.
It’s incredible to believe that Nairobi sprang up around the railway, just a little over 100 years ago. From my account of today’s rundown Lunatic Express service, you might dismiss the railways in East Africa – but history tells a very different story.
If you are interested in history, I highly recommend these articles:
Following the line of Kenya’s development is as easy as following the development of railway lines through the country.
Why did so many railway workers get killed by lions?
“The Man-Eaters of Tsavo and other East African Adventures” recalls the nine month period of terror during 1898 when over 100 men were killed by two man-eating lions. This book made British engineer Lieutenant Colonel J. H. Patterson, D.S.O. a celebrity.
“Night after night, workers disappeared in ones and twos…” and an American hunter was called in…
Arriving in the continent he has dreamed of forever, Patterson meets his project. There are problems with it: competing French and German rivals, ethnic hatred among the crews and, on Patterson’s first day there, a worker is attacked by a lion. He goes to “sort it out” by shooting the beast with one shot; gaining the admiration of his crews, lifting spirits, adding motivation to complete the bridge, and unleashing a nightmare.
Only weeks after the shooting the camp is suddenly besieged by a pair of giant man-eating lions. Their first “kill” is Mahina (Henry Cele), considered the strongest man in the camp. This serves to unnerve every man on the project, including Indian rabble-rouser Abdullah, who doesn’t like Patterson from the start. Nerves jangle and fray as the lions repeatedly and relentlessly attack and attack and attack! They strike under the cover of night AND during the heat of day; They kill not for hunger, not for sport, but simply because they like it. Men are dragged from their beds and mauled to death in the tall grasses; the hospital becomes a blood-bathe; Laborers aren’t safe as the beasts leap out and snatch them from their work. Everything is falling apart and Patterson is at his wit’s end as Beaumont arrives to make matters worse. And still the lions attack and attack and attack.
Enter Big Game Hunter Charles Remington who is as determined to destroy the lions as the lions seem determined to eat every man in camp.
From a review of The Ghost and the Darkness, a 1996 Oscar-winning film, staring Val Kilmer and Michael Douglas.
Have you traveled on the ‘Lunatic Express’ train from Nairobi to Mombasa?
Writing about these journeys prompts other people to share their experiences.
“I took the train in 1982 when I was a student. I travelled down to the coast with my fishing rods. I didn’t get a (sleeping) compartment. I threw my fishing rods in the overhead bag rack, climbed up and slept there for the whole journey, from Nairobi to Mombasa.”
Richard ‘Bug’ from Watamu
That’s an uncomfortable way to spend 12+ hours, believe me!
Once upon a time, the train ran all the way from Kampala through Nairobi on to Mombasa.
Nairobi was very different in those days. Even before the train reached Nairobi airport, you were in the bush. There were first-class compartments and a first-class dining car.
Back in the day, the train drivers were all Sikhs.
Mike from Kampala (It all sounded pretty fabulous!)
What are your train travel tips? And what are your memories of the Lunatic Express during its heyday?
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